tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4061870849031468581.post6242114120534377432..comments2024-03-27T05:00:00.090-04:00Comments on Letters to a Young Librarian: I'm Not Sorry (Unless I Really Am)Jessica Olinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00282500023825318766noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4061870849031468581.post-35946740134592142992013-03-11T09:44:52.104-04:002013-03-11T09:44:52.104-04:00I think there is a regional difference as well. I ...I think there is a regional difference as well. I am a native New Yorker now living in Virginia. I one heard a great explanation of the southern I'm sorry vs the northern I'm sorry. I wish I could recreate it. It has to do with empathy rather than admitting guilt.librarianhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13207246627648299124noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4061870849031468581.post-63348033162589035782013-02-26T15:36:43.642-05:002013-02-26T15:36:43.642-05:00I know I am guilty of saying I am sorry, when I am...I know I am guilty of saying I am sorry, when I am not actually sorry but attempting to be polite. So, I am stealing the wisdom of not actually saying it, unless I am. I do get a bit irritated when a patron says, "It's okay" or "You're fine" (I know I am fine I am trying to be polite, you are the one doing something wrong) so hopefully not saying "sorry" all the time will help. Thanks! Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4061870849031468581.post-396150594835656022013-02-26T11:27:42.657-05:002013-02-26T11:27:42.657-05:00http://xkcd.com/945/
For me, it varies. "I&#...http://xkcd.com/945/<br /><br />For me, it varies. "I'm sorry" is useful when a patron asks for a service or item we should reasonably have (i.e. biography of Thomas Jefferson), but we do not (because everyone else in their class is researching Thomas Jefferson). But I try not to apologize to people, just because they're being dicks. "I'm sorry, but your children are a walking noise hazard" doesn't cut it. OTOH, I am unable to say "Will you shut your screech monkeys up", which is sometimes what I feel.Library Ogrehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06282162336240345836noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4061870849031468581.post-73547177743980193612013-02-26T11:20:21.628-05:002013-02-26T11:20:21.628-05:00B,
John already said it, but I want to add my re...B, <br /><br />John already said it, but I want to add my response. I do know that there are meanings to the phrase (and I know how dictionaries work) - and I mentioned that in my post. Also, for some people, "I'm sorry" is more of a tic than a social lubricant.<br /><br />Incidentally, as a rude teenager who was hurting from the death of my own father, I responded "Why are you sorry? You didn't kill him, did you?" whenever someone told me that they were sorry to hear about my father's death.Jessica Olinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00282500023825318766noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4061870849031468581.post-37010775258001922632013-02-26T11:00:40.566-05:002013-02-26T11:00:40.566-05:00The emoticon was a social lubricant too. See? No c...The emoticon was a social lubricant too. See? No confusion!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05764686989342179833noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4061870849031468581.post-68681545011940785512013-02-26T10:57:06.154-05:002013-02-26T10:57:06.154-05:00Social lubricants are not always the best way to a...Social lubricants are not always the best way to approach situation and can instill more confusion to an already, possibly, tense situation. Also the social lubricant is likely a colloquial that would lead to more confusion in a diverse setting such as a university library with international students or a public library with newly arrived Americans.<br /><br />Perhaps your ethnically diverse sangha can explain that to you. :D <br /><br />Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05764686989342179833noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4061870849031468581.post-63783544537226249972013-02-26T10:06:25.908-05:002013-02-26T10:06:25.908-05:00Saying "sorry" does not necessarily mean...Saying "sorry" does not necessarily mean that you're apologizing. If I say to someone "I'm sorry to hear that your father died" I'm not apologizing for having received the news, but am saying that the news pains me ("sorry" coming from a root that means "sore"). <br /><br />And if we say to someone "I'm sorry, but only staff are allowed in this area" this is using the word "sorry" as a social lubricant, so that our speech doesn't sound rude or abrupt, but even here there's still an echo of the "it pains me" connotation of "sorry"; it can be unpleasant (even painful) to tell someone they're trespassing.<br /><br />The dictionaries in your library can confirm that "sorry" is not exclusively apologetic in intent. Bodhipaksahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588604512266015695noreply@blogger.com